Tricia Alexandro: Baby Steps

Doug GoldringCommunity

“Her TikTok video went viral!” “His first book became a New York Times bestseller!” As a culture, we love a fast-fame story. It’s a lot sexier to think about a meteoric rise than a consistent practice that, over many years, leads to a desired end result.

As an actor, a personal trainer, and a coach, I’ve heard the grumblings of folks who thought this whole thing should be easier than it is. “I’ve been exercising for three weeks, why aren’t I seeing results?” “I’ve been taking acting class and auditioning for a year/five years/ ten years, why aren’t I on Broadway, in a big-budget film, a series regular on a hit show?” I’ve also had these thoughts myself. Over time, this mindset can lead to discouragement, despair, and giving up.

What’s the alternative? It’s not a sexy answer, but it’s, in my experience, a much more peace-filled practice: baby steps.

As humans, we naturally want to go to big leaps, but that approach often leads to burnout and disillusionment. Instead, if we want longevity and sustainability, we need to create a habit of showing up consistently for our careers, for our fitness, for the life we want. And tiny is the way to go.

What does that look like? BJ Fogg who is one of the world’s leading authorities on the science of behavior change says, “Take a behavior you want, make it tiny, find where it fits naturally in your life, and nurture its growth. If you want to create long-term change, it’s best to start small.”

This could mean I spend 30 minutes on Friday at 2pm self-submitting to projects on Actors Access or Backstage, or on Thursday I spend 1 hour taking an acting class, then 20 minutes e-mailing folks I’ve worked with on projects before, to nurture our relationship and ask how they’re doing. Maybe Wednesday I go to Drama Books for 30 minutes to read inspiring work, and Saturday I spend 15 minutes writing a monologue for myself, just because I want to practice my creativity, and do something that feels challenging and slightly scary.

None of this sounds groundbreaking, but each action is a deposit into our career and a reinforcement of the identity we want to live into: professional actor. By practicing these behaviors, we make acting more of a consistent part of our lives. As a result, we notice an uptick in our self-esteem and confidence. We notice that we present ourselves and talk about ourselves differently, that people start to view us and treat us differently. We get asked to do more things, to audition more often, to do this reading or that short film.

It doesn’t materialize overnight, and it might not land you on the cover of a magazine, but it will give you a sense of purpose, of focus, of pride. You will have the satisfaction that comes from consistent deposits into the life you want, the joy that results from following your true desires. And I’d venture to say, that satisfaction is longer lasting than the dopamine hit of instant fame.

So, let’s focus on what we can control, and build a life we love, one tiny habit at a time.

– Tricia


Upcoming classes with Tricia include Acting: Creating a Thriving Career II starting 10/12, and Acting: Creating a Thriving Career I starting 10/30.

Check out TBG’s full schedule of classes, including youth options!